Raising resilient children
Image: A primary school-aged girl holding her father’s hand.
Why resilience matters
Resilient children are better able to manage stress, form healthy relationships, and maintain a positive outlook, even when things don’t go as planned. Rather than crumbling under pressure or giving up in the face of failure, they’re more likely to persevere and bounce back.
Resilience isn’t an innate trait that some children have and others don’t. It’s a skill that can be nurtured over time, through a combination of supportive parenting, modelling healthy coping strategies and creating opportunities for children to face manageable challenges.
Building a strong foundation
The first step in raising a resilient child is to create a secure and supportive home environment. When children feel safe and loved, they’re more likely to take risks and try new things, knowing they have a reliable safety net to fall back on.
Encourage open communication and let your child know it’s okay to talk about their feelings, even the difficult ones. Validating their emotions helps them understand that all feelings are normal and manageable. Rather than rushing to fix a problem for them, try guiding them through the process of thinking it through themselves. Ask questions like, “What do you think you could try?” or “What might help you feel better?”
Teaching practical coping strategies
Children benefit from learning concrete strategies to deal with stress and disappointment. These might include:
- Deep breathing or mindfulness techniques to calm down when feeling overwhelmed.
- Positive self-talk, such as reminding themselves, “I can handle this” or “I’ve done hard things before.”
- Problem-solving skills, like breaking a big challenge into smaller, more manageable steps.
- Knowing when and how to ask for help, whether from a parent, teacher or friend.
Parents can reinforce these skills by modelling them in everyday life. Let your child see how you handle your own frustrations or setbacks. Narrating your thought process — “That didn’t go as I hoped, but I’ll try a different approach,” teaches resilience by example.
Encouraging a growth mindset
A key part of resilience is developing a growth mindset, the belief that abilities and intelligence can improve with effort and perseverance. Praise your child’s effort rather than just their success, and help them see mistakes as learning opportunities rather than failures.
Resilience doesn’t mean avoiding stress or shielding children from all hardship. It means helping them learn how to face life’s inevitable bumps with courage and confidence. With guidance, patience and support, parents can help their children build the inner strength they need to thrive in the face of life’s many challenges.
-
A child’s mental health is just as important as their physical health, yet it is often overlooked. With the pressures of school, social relationships, and the digital world, children today face a range of challenges that can impact their emotional wellbeing. -
Screens are an unavoidable part of everyday life. From smartphones and tablets to laptops and televisions, children are growing up in an environment where technology is both a source of education and entertainment.
